Batman, vacuums, and huggy zombies

so late last night i was reading a wonderful zombie book called super zombie juice mega bomb, and thus had one of the strangest dreams ever.  The zombie apocaplypse had just begun, however it was not as planned.  The zombies were giant pink fluffy teddie bears and they zombified you by giving you a hug. Now since this is such a terrifying disease who else would come to help me in my efforts to slay the zombie bear menace but Batman.  So of course in this completely logical dream my weapon of choice is a handi-vac equipped with a bayonet.  Oh did I mention that to kill the cuddly beasts you had to unstuff them.  So eventually i woke up because i had been hugged and batman tore out my stuffing. the end

punctuation is powerful

Punctuation is powerful and if you don't believe me take a look at these.


Let's eat grandma!

Let's eat, grandma!

two extremely different sentences seperated only by a comma

A woman without her man is nothing

A woman; without her, man is nothing.

A woman without her man, is nothing.

even more different

Dear women

Dear women,
  There is a good chance that I or someone close to me finds you beautiful.  Please don't feel like you have to go and buy skanky clothes or wear too much make up or act a certain way around men.  You are beautiful inside and out and any man who cannot appreciate your inner beauty is not worth your time.  I hope you realize that i am being truthful.  You may even say that nobody can forgive you for what you have done or that you are not able to be loved.  I promise you that this is not true.  There is somebody for everybody.  Just please don't give up.  And also i will be here for you if you ever have trouble or need someone to talk to.

Sincerely,
A guy who truly cares.

What's that on your face? IT WAS PAIN

Well this morning i woke up sore, bruised, and all cut up. You may wonder how this happened.  The easiest way to explain it is that i went to The Champ in Lemoyne, PA.  During this time i made a couple new friends and hung out with some of my best friends.  I finally got to see my best friends up on stage at our favorite local venue.  The fun of the night was only accentuated by doing what i like to call crab moshing with My friend Trenten, The drummer of the wonderful band The Mourning Parade.  Then during the performance of a band that goes by the name Road to the Milestone we had what can only be described as a glow stick strobe light mosh pit dubstep rave part.  And it was all glorious.  To make hannah happy "in that moment i swear we were infinite."  Thank you and good day

I'm like an angry Charlie Brown

So who wants to know what really makes me angry around this time of year.  Stores that put up products for christmas BEFORE IT IS EVEN HALLOWEEN!  And you know what else makes me mad?  How much we have gotten away from the true meaning of these holidays such as thanksgiving and christmas.  Thanksgiving is about being together with people you love and you are supposed to enjoy it, and give thanks that you have such wonderful things in your life.  If you start to see it as "I get lots of food but i have to endure these people first." THEN YOU ARE GOING ABOUT IT ALL WRONG!  And as for Christmas, it isn't about who gets the coolest gadgets or who has the most lights.  It is about being together, and i have trouble with this too i will admit it.  Go into it without expecting too many lights or bows or expensive gadgets.  Because if that is how you view christmas then i feel sorry for you.  Let's all take a lesson from Charles Schulz, christmas doesn't have to be pretty but it should be beautiful.

I know this seems like a bit early to do this sort of thing but i just wanted it to be said.

Happy friday

It's friday so i would like to impose upon you my list of the ten worst songs ever, these are not ranked in order of how much my ears bleed when i hear them however.

1. Friday- Rebecca Black
Everybody has heard it and we all hate it.  If you have not, rejoice.

2. Ice Ice Baby- Vanilla Ice
I will admit i have listened to the song but only to make fun of it.  Little fun fact for you, whenever Vanilla Ice realized he couldn't hack it with his hip-hop, he renamed himself v-ice and hired korn for instrumentals on too cold, which is the same flipping thing a ice ice baby but heavier.  Diamond encrusted crap is still crap.

3. I'm too sexy- Right Said Fred
This song just makes me want to punch a kitten with two legs, enough said.

4.Anything by crazy frog
OH DEAR LORD SOMEONE PLEASE JUST STAB ME IN THE EARS MAKE THIS PAIN STOP!!!!!

5. Baby-Justin Beiber
This song makes me want to kick a baby baby baby.

6. It's a small world- Disneyland
Most infectious earworm of all time.

7.Crank Dat- Soulja Boy
This man, if you can call him that, is such an attention hog that in one of his songs he actually said F da troops.  Then went on to talk about how gangsta he is.  You are not fooling anyone you did a song with Justin Beiber, you aren't as hardcore as you proclaim.

8. Everything else by Rebecca Black
Sweetheart i am sorry but we only tolerate you to make fun of you stop feeding the fire.

9. Never gonna give you up- Rick Astley
I have not been able to sit through this whole song sitting still ever.

And finally

10. I love you- Barney

What are these kids on that they are seeing a large purple dinosaur, who is powered by imagination, singing about his love for all of them?

Thank you for reading and here is a cute picture of a fluffy bird

 

Questions that may never be answered

What does it say under hair color on your drivers license if you are bald?

What color would a smurf turn if you choked him?

Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Why is a boxing ring square?

Why is it called alcoholics anonymous if the first thing you do is introduce yourself?

Why is abbreviation such a long word?

What is another word for thesaurus?

If a word is spelled wrong in a dictionary how would we be able to tell?

thank you for reading and enjoy your night, day or whenever you are reading this 

Phrases that make me want to punt a chihuahua

1. I know right

Oh dear lord somebody please find the man or woman that created this saying and beat them about the head with a rolled up news paper while screaming "BAD DOG!" 

2. Just kidding

used in the context of something like "Hey that was really good.  Haha just kidding!" 

oh really well thank you anonymous person because i really value your opinion and you are a close friend.  Haha just kidding

3. Anything from Jersey Shore

yep spray tanned drunks who have no idea what their heritage is about but still brag about it, how has this show not been canceled yet.

4. Just saying

Well no duh you would still be just saying it if you hadn't said just saying.

5. Word

Oh thank you so much rappers and hip-hop artists for this little fountain of overwhelming depth i cannot show my appreciation enough.

6. You know what you should do?

Oh no i don't please share with me oh enlightened one, i cannot fathom your intelligence, i mean i haven't even asked for your help or for you to interject yourself into my personal life but still here you are thank you oh so very much you are my savior sir i am not worthy to kiss the ground beneath your flipping feet.

And last but not least

7. Awkward

Not until you said awkward it wasn't okay spotlight addicts.

And now for your picture of the post.  Have a good day to my two followers and as always, Big brother is watching

RAWWR ima llama

I may have come off as a bit hostile in my first post but that isn't exactly me.  I can laugh at myself and the world around it and thank god I can otherwise i would have snapped by now.  In my last post i said i don't like people, what i meant by that is i don't like us as a species however i love individuals.  and now for something completely different.

Things that make me want to punch small woodland creatures

1. people who have no idea what they are talking about
2. people who have no idea what they are talking about but keep talking
3. people who know they have no idea what they are talking but still keep talking
4. people who know they know what they are talking about and rub it in your face every chance they get
5. people in general 

Thank you for listening, and now for something completely different

Why hello there

Why hello there, my name is chuck, don't bother telling me your name because i either won't remember it or i may just not care.  I love music, comic books, pokemon, memebase, my friends and oddly enough cooking.  Now before you go judging me as happy go lucky be advised my sarcasm is considered a concealed weapon and is illegal in 7 states and France, I am also extremely cynical and am not afraid to show it i am not exactly sure why i am starting a blog i just want to get my thoughts down somewhere. And finally welcome to the show.